As a film critic, I am willing to look past a lot of questionable content within the context of a film’s storytelling, but sometimes there comes a point where even I have to draw the line and recognize that a given filmmaker is operating entirely in bad faith.

(from left) Aaron (Luke Macfarlane) and Bobby (Billy Eichner) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

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Supposed comedian Billy Eichner has been making the rounds lately begging anyone with a pulse to watch his new film Bros, which according to him (and no one else), is the first gay rom-com by a major studio in 100 years.

Forget the fact that a film like, say, Love, Simon, hit theaters in 2018 courtesy of 20th Century Fox.

(from left) Aaron (Luke Macfarlane) and Bobby (Billy Eichner) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

Of course, every six days, some schmuck comes out claiming to have created “the first” piece of non-hetero non-white entertainment in history when they are too lazy (or too stupid) to realize that history was done decades before them.

In the minds of progressives, nothing existed before Donald Trump was elected president.

(from left) Aaron (Luke Macfarlane) and Bobby (Billy Eichner) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

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The entire sell of this film is that gay people have never had a romantic comedy for themselves, having until now settled for bad Hallmark movies and When Harry Met Sally.

Bros is a self-insert ‘romantic comedy’ about a man named Bobby Lieber (Eichner), a 40-year-old single gay man living in New York City who works as a museum curator.

(from left) Angela (Ts Madison), Bobby (Billy Eichner), Wanda (Miss Lawrence), Tamara (Eve Lindley), Robert (Jim Rash) and Cherry (Dot-Marie Jones) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

In his free time, Bobby spends his days hooking up with random men on Grindr trying to find a small piece of what he believes to be “love.”

One night, during a gay rave party, Bobby meets a “macho” man named Aaron (Luke Macfarlane).

(from left) Aaron (Luke Macfarlane) and Bobby (Billy Eichner) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

Though Aaron is the hunky, polar opposite of everything Bobby likes in men, he still ends up falling in love with him and stating what he believes is a “relationship.”

From there, the film centers on how Bobby deals with the twin stresses of managing his love life and creating an LGBTQ exhibit at the museum.

Billy Eichner on the set of Bros, directed by Nicholas Stoller. Photo Credit: Nicole Rivelli/Universal Pictures © 2022 Universal Studios. All Rights Reserved.

Eichner was adamant that he wanted to use this film to expose audiences, especially straight audiences, to the reality of those living in the LGBTQ community.

Unfortunately for him, real life exposed them to that long before the film could be released.

Luke Macfarlane (center) as Aaron in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

If you recall, the original red band trailer for the movie featured a gay orgy scene that was meant to be shocking and played for laughs.

However, shortly after that scene was released, a real-life global outbreak of monkeypox caused the studio to shelve the red band trailer all together.

The reason? Universal didn’t want to feed into the association of gay mens’ sexual promiscuity with the spread of Monkeypox, despite it being the biggest contributing factor to the disease’s outbreak.

(from left) Bobby (Billy Eichner) and Aaron (Luke Macfarlane) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

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Bros is a wide-open window into how ‘sex and relationships’ are viewed in the LGBTQ community, portraying polyamorous dating, ‘throuples’, gay orgies, gender reveal gay orgies, and hook-up culture on steroids as the “norm” for its members.

In one scene, Bobby meets a guy on Grindr, walks into his home, and within seconds the two are masturbating on the bed together. Bobby then walks away in shame.

(from left) Bobby (Billy Eichner) and Aaron (Luke Macfarlane) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

This is what the film portrays as “normal sexual experiences” for gay men in a big city.

And you wonder why people don’t want their kids exposed to this lifestyle?

(from left) Bobby (Billy Eichner) and Aaron (Luke Macfarlane) in Bros, directed by Nicholas Stoller. Photo Credit: Universal Pictures © 2022 Universal Studios. All Rights Reserved.

Though the film is very much inspired by traditional rom-com tropes, they do not work within the Eichner’s depiction of the LGBTQ community.

The idea of romance is two people coming together and eventually starting a new life together.

(from left) Tamara (Eve Lindley), Robert (Jim Rash), Angela (Ts Madison), Cherry (Dot-Marie Jones) and Wanda (Miss Lawrence) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

But in Bros, not only do Aaron end up having sex within the first 20 minutes of the film, but they also have sex with multiple partners throughout.

The LGBTQ community has watered down the concept of sex to such a degree that what is supposed to be an intimate moment between lovers is turned into a formal greeting with no attachment.

(from left) Aaron (Luke Macfarlane) and Bobby (Billy Eichner) in Bros, directed by Nicholas Stoller. Photo Credit: Universal Pictures © 2022 Universal Studios. All Rights Reserved.

And while the film tries so hard to emulate heterosexual ‘Hallmark’ romance movies, the LGBTQ community has spent years tearing down traditional relationship standards that when they try to make their own love story under those paramaters, everything falls apart.

After all, long-term relationships don’t exist in this universe and despite what modern-day progressives will tell you, men can’t get pregnant, so there will be no families starting in this scenario either.

All of this destroys the concept of the genre, and in terms of Bros, leaves you pissing in the wind for the film’s runtime.

Luke Macfarlane and Billy Eichner in Bros (2022)

Bros tries to have its cake and eat it too, but it doesn’t work. It’s runtime is bloadted, the jokes aren’t going to be funny to anyone outside of the LGBTQ bubble, and the camerawork is shoddy

But none of these are its biggest sin.

(from left) Tamara (Eve Lindley), Robert (Jim Rash), Cherry (Dot-Marie Jones), Wanda (Miss Lawrence), Bobby (Billy Eichner) and Angela (Ts Madison) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

In the wake of Florida’s Parental Rights in Education Law, passed by Governor Ron DeSantis earlier this year and which bans the teaching of sexuality and transgenderism to children between kindergarten through third grade, Eichner inexplicably used an R-rated sex comedy to make the case for grooming children into the LGBTQ lifestyle – the same one that in this film has been displayed as nothing but degenerate and emotionally damaging.

(from left) Angela (Ts Madison), Bobby (Billy Eichner), Wanda (Miss Lawrence), Tamara (Eve Lindley), Robert (Jim Rash) and Cherry (Dot-Marie Jones) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

In the film, Aaron’s mother is a school teacher who protests the idea that children of elementary school age should be learning about LGBTQ history on the grounds that it’s not appropriate for their age.

Bobby (Eichner’s character – don’t worry, I don’t expect you to keep track of this garbage) then proceeds to counter her argument with an anecdote about how his parents allowed him to see a sex show at the age of 12, which in the end helped him to become more comfortable with his sexuality.

(from left) Robert (Jim Rash), Tamara (Eve Lindley), Wanda (Miss Lawrence), Bobby (Billy Eichner), Cherry (Dot-Marie Jones) and Angela (Ts Madison) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

It’s the classic argument of “well it worked for me personally and I turned out normal,” but guess what?

No, Billy, it didn’t work for you. You are a 43-year-old, miserable, childless man whose live still revolves about having sex with random men from a social media app. Using your life as a measuring stick to groom children into your lifestyle is unacceptable

(from left) Peter (Peter Kim), Paul (Justin Covington), Tina (Monica Raymund), Edgar (Guillermo Díaz), Tom (D’Lo), Lucas (Becca Blackwell), Bobby (Billy Eichner), Aaron (Luke Macfarlane), Marty (Symone) and Henry (Guy Branum) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

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Out of respect and professionalism, I was willing to turn a blind eye to a lot of stuff for the sake of this review. Adults are adults, and we can let them make bad decisions.

But the second the film tried to make the argument of grooming children into the by-their-own-admission degeneracy that is presented in this film, that is where Bros crossed the line.

(from left, foreground) Aaron (Luke Macfarlane) and Bobby (Billy Eichner) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

The LGBTQ community used the film Bros as a window into their lifestyle, and instead, they offered a look inside the Trojan horse we let into the gates.

(from left) Cherry (Dot-Marie Jones), Angela (Ts Madison), Wanda (Miss Lawrence), Bobby (Billy Eichner) and Tamara (Eve Lindley) in Bros, co-written, produced and directed by Nicholas Stoller.

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'Bros' Review - Narcissism, Degeneracy, And Grooming, Oh My!
First Pro Groomer Movie Of The Year
PROS:
  • Luke Macfarlane is the only respectable actor in the film
CONS:
  • 115 Minutes Of Degeneracy
  • Terrible camerawork & bloated runtime
  • First 'pro groomer' movie of the year
0Overall Score
Reader Rating: (46 Votes)
0.1