Nintendo Censors Scene Of Enemy Goombas Cat-Calling Female Party Member From ‘Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door’ Remake
Spencer Baculi
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In the latest case of a video game remake making an edit to its source material’s original script, Nintendo has censored a scene wherein a trio of enemies aggressively cat-call one of Mario’s female allies, from their upcoming remake of Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door.
Occurring early-on in the red-hatted plumber’s two dimensional journey and serving as the set-up to the game’s ‘live combat’ tutorial, the scene in question sees Mario and his newfound allies Goombella, a friendly female Goomba, and Professor Frankly, a bespectacled and academic-minded Goomba, accosted by an assorted trio of rough and tumble Goombas as they attempt to make their way through the ruins found underneath the city of Rogueport.
In the original 2004 GameCube release of the The Thousand-Year Door, upon crossing paths with the enemy trio, each of its members proceed to cat-call Goombella, to which she ultimately responds by telling them to kick rocks.
Unable to handle this rejection, the Goombas then proceed to save face by attacking both her and Mario, thus kicking off the first combat encounter in which players can actually control the party:
[Time Stamp: 00:26]
Goomba: “Hey! Hey, man! What’s up? Who’s the hottie you got there with you?
Paragoomba: “Wassup, baby? Why don’t you hang with us for a while? We play real nice!
Spike Goomba: “Man, what’s a FINE-lookin’ Goomba doin’ with a tubby mustache man like that?!?”
Goombella: “Oh, it is, like, SO sweet that you boys think I’m cute! Seriously! Yeah, guys like you make me feel like…TOTALLY BARFING! Now get out of our way!”
Goomba: “Ouch that was cold!”
Paragoomba: “What, you’re too good for us? Come off it, sister!
Spike Goomba: “Nobody zings us like that! Nobody! Let’s get ’em!”
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However, as seen in a preview of the title provided by CGMagazine, the upcoming 2024 Switch remake sees this scene plays out in a much different fashion.
Therein, rather than leaping to blows due to being rejected by Goombella, the enemy trio instead take issue with Mario and company’s trespassing on their underground turf:
[Time Stamp: 04:08]
Goomba: “Hey! Hey, man! What’s up? You think it’s cool to just waltz your way into OUR underground?
Paragoomba: “Typical! You surface-level snobs are so stuck-up. ‘OoOoh, I get to see the sun! I like to breathe clean air! OoOoh!'”
Spike Goomba: “Heh! Yeah! Come on over here, scruffy mustache man…We’re gonna teach you some proper manners…”
Goombella: “Leave him alone! Can’t two academics and a world-famous hero wander the sewers of a port town in peace? If this is your usual greeting to visitors, then you must have learned it down here…because IT STINKS!
Goomba: “Ouch! That was cold!”
Paragoomba: “What, you’re too good for a fight?! If you ain’t lookin’ to tussle, then stay out of the sewer!”
Spike Goomba: Nobody doesn’t start a fight with us! Nobody! Let’s get ’em!”
Notably, per a 2004 translation guide of the game’s Japanese script provided by GameFaqs user spookychee, in its original, non-localized release, Mario’s encounter with the Goombas plays out roughly the same as it would in English, with Goombella being hit on and rejecting the enemies.
As of writing, Nintendo has not yet offered any public comment as to the reasons behind their censoring of their Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door remake.
Meanwhile, the game itself is currently on track to unfold exclusively onto Nintendo Switch consoles on May 23rd.
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