The comic book industry will soon be changing as we know it… but who cares?! Let’s have a ginormous party in the Savage Land! If our universe is about to implode, we might as well have some fun while it’s happening, in all its life-crushing, dream smothering glory. Right?
At least that’s what we saw the citizens of Krakoa doing in X-Force #9. And why shouldn’t they? Mutants have a lock on the world’s economy, and they’re arguably just as technologically advanced as Wakanda (even if they oddly forget that they have jets capable of orbital velocity).
By my count, this is the third big Krakoan party. This one in the Green Lagoon being the second-largest since House of X #6. This, however, was less suggested, and more demonstrated complete with a two-page Where’s Waldo style illustration. I thought it’d be fun to break down the happenings of the event, piece by piece – because let me tell you, it’s a lot.
Spin the SNIKT
The issue opens with Wolverine (Logan) seemingly playing an innocent game of spin the bottle. However, instead of Jean and Scott, it’s his sorta-daughter, Gabby, and his son, Daken. The rules aren’t stated but whomever the bottle lands on presumably has to pop their claws into their head.
Daken loses and has to poke himself in the noddle. I suppose it’s harmless enough for those that can regenerate their bodies – but it’d be a bit more of a problem for Wolverine. You see, unlike Daken and Gabby – Wolverine has an adamantium-plated skull. His damage would be a tad bit more… expensive.
X-Treme Sighting
Masquerading as a mermaid, we got our first sighting of the Australian adaptive-metamorphic X-Man, Lifeguard. Though she debuted back in Chris Claremont’s 2001 series, X-Treme X-Men. Other than being awe-inspiring gold – she’s also half royal Shi’ar.
Dazzler’s Band Gets a Name
Though I’m sure Sharkgirl and whoever’s playing the guitar probably aren’t going to tour with Dazzler anytime soon – X-Force artist, Joshua Cassara, took to Twitter to give the band a name. And that name is… Dazzler and the Resurrections. Cute. Inaccurate, but cute.
FYI the band’s name is “Dazzler and the Resurrections.” pic.twitter.com/3hudvLhKFM
— Joshua Cassara (@joshuacassara) March 20, 2020
Continuity-lite Character Designs
Cassara certainly had a lot to illustrate here – I’ll give him a break on that, however, there are several continuity-breaking outfits. Marrow (next to Magneto) is rocking what I call her ultimate form, something we haven’t seen since like ’99. The same can be said about Jesse Bedlam and Frenzy. Both also in their ’90s looks.
Villainous Headwear
Behind the bar, eagle-eyed fans will notice headwear from two of the X-Men’s most fearsome foes. Shadow King’s fez, Onslaught’s giant Magneto head, and Stryfe’s Shredder-inspired helmet. There’s a skull there, but I can’t place it for the life of me.
Hidden Messages and Special Decorations
Peppered throughout the party you’ll see some Krakoa language X-Men theme tiki statues and stools. You’ll find the Krakoa edict make more mutants by Wolverine’s table, Reserved under Apocalypse and an arrow with Westchester scribbled across it. Look close enough and you’ll find a Cyclops tiki on stage and a Magneto-head stool at the bar.
The Newly Resurrected
In a previous article, we spoke of mutants that haven’t been brought back as of yet. I’m glad to announce at least two of our picks have been spotted among the revelers. Thunderbird can be seen enjoying the Resurrections (and fondling Psylocke). Tempo, wearing her bucket helmet, is bikini-clad near Bling! and Transonic.
Related: X-Men: 10 Mutants That Can Still Be Resurrected
Mutant Romance
Scattered around the scene its clear folks are letting their guard down. New, and even a couple of old couples, can be spotted. There’s the aforementioned Thunderbird/ Psylocke pairing. Polaris seems to be annoyed by Havok. Gambit and Rogue are booed-up at the bar and Strong Guy appears to have his arm around Selene.
Forge is well within Storm’s personal space while Penance (or Monet) is flirting with Maggot at the bar. Emma’s brother, Christian, is sneaking off with somebody not named Iceman, and Sinister is chilling in the cut alongside a shadowy figure with devil-horns.
Bonus Round
Gentle appears next to Magneto proving relations with Wakanda aren’t completely dead. During a brawl Gorgeous George, one of Mister Sinister’s Nasty Boys, got kicked so hard, he bled. Mercury’s topless. Nightcrawler ‘Bamfs’ a total of three times. There are five Maddox dupes, and Sebastian Shaw doesn’t seem able to hold down his liquor.
The Green Lagoon party was quite the event. Even Apocalypse himself made an appearance! Seeing the X-Men enjoy themselves between bouts of tragedy is sort of a tradition. Basketball, Baseball, holiday parties – the X-Men are no strangers to a good time. What did you think about it?