‘Frankenstein’ Review – A Bloated Celebration Of Ravenous Overacting, Ostentatious Over-Stylizing, And Monochromatic Overkill
Abhorrent and grotesque, this outrage against nature walks the earth, defying all that is pure, its very presence leaving a curse upon the air. Without any true form to call its own, the hideous creature is a composite of rotting, reanimated life cycles that have already run their course, and no matter how anyone tries to destroy it, this awful abomination simply will not die.
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But enough about the modern mainstream film industry!
This umpteenth adaptation of Mary Shelley’s immortal 1818 Gothic horror classic, Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus, is like a quality cut of meat that has been nearly mummified with seasoning to cover up the fact that it has been sitting on public display for way too long, and reheated far too many times. But I’m getting a little too far ahead of myself here.
Professionalism dictates that I give a brief rundown of the film, and there’s bound to be at least one lonesome creature out there who hasn’t seen any of the sixteen feature films starring Frankenstein’s creation, the Mel Brooks parody, Blackenstein, or the one from 1948 where it crossed paths with Bud Abbott and Lou Costello. Light yourself a cigar, and make some espresso while I tell you of a movie that’s far from ‘GOOOOD’.
Victor Frankenstein (Oscar Isaac) is a brilliant, but egotistical scientist from mid-19th-century Europe who declared death his mortal enemy as a boy after his mother (Mia Goth) died while giving birth to his little brother, William.
He makes a lifelong vow to put an end to its reign of terror on civilized society. The overzealous pro-lifer is expelled from surgical school years later when he reanimated a partial human torso, and effectively scares the bejesus out of his devout, God-fearing professors of science, but he’s saved from poverty row by a benefactor.
Wealthy arms merchant Henrich Harlander (Christoph Waltz) offers to fund Victor’s work, and he even hooks him up with a giant, awesome-looking CGI tower to do his research in stylish solitude,
This overstuffed plot is only getting thicker as Harlander introduces Victor to his daughter, Elizabeth (Mia Goth again), who turns out to be engaged to the now adult, and far less morbid, William (Felix Kammerer).
She loathes her future brother-in-law from their first meeting, but this doesn’t stop the mad scientist from catching the feels for his mother’s doppelganger, regardless of the incessant judgment and her browless browbeating throughout every scene that they share with each other.
Victor is convinced that he can win her heart by giving life to a large humanoid creature that he puts together from the pieces of Crimean War casualties strewn about the surrounding countryside, and then violently abuses for not learning how to use words fast enough.
Realizing that he has blown every chance that Elizabeth has never given him, and assuming he has created a moron, Victor sets fire to the lab with his creation (Jacob Elordi) chained up inside, but the misunderstood monster escapes. That’s when the problem goes from bad to worse for Frankenstein, though not nearly as much as it does for the viewer.
This movie is for those who enjoy extravagant set designs, superficial gothic tones that come off as more of a crude impersonation, pacing that resembles a cat with the zoomies, butchery of the English accent by a lead actress, and an ensemble cast of heavy hitters who each take turns chewing every last bit of scenery in this 150-minute display of monochromatic decadence.
In other words, it’s for anyone who enjoyed that Nosferatu re-remake from last year. Elordi’s performance as The Creature is the only one that isn’t loaded with a manic frenzy, and it’s the only character that feels fully fleshed out (no pun intended).
Its appearance is softer than all previous portrayals as it transitions from looking like a cross between one of the Engineers from Prometheus and a heavily mutilated Dr. Weir from Event Horizon to that quiet, thoughtful 8ft tall dude that you’ll always find playing a bass guitar in some terrible black metal outfit with an unreadable logo.
It’s not the worst depiction of Frankenstein’s creation (Hotel Transylvania), but the film suffers from the same issues as the slightly better version from 1994, with the frenzied pacing and zero patience for subtlety or nuance.
Guillermo del Toro (Cronos, Pan’s Labyrinth, Pacific Rim) has always been a great visionary with a flair for style, a genuine love for the macabre, and an adorkable personality that makes him more than a little difficult to dislike. Still, he doesn’t leave much room for substance in his films these days.
The very same can be said about this hollow glass ornament of Mall Goth Romanticism. Elizabeth forms a brief bond of loving compassion with Frankenstein’s monster that’s very reminiscent of Guillermo’s Oscar-winning 2017 film, where he matched a mute janitor with the Black Lagoon’s most famous creature.
However, the payoff isn’t nearly as spicy, and one can’t help but wonder if The Mummy is next on his quest to get the classic monsters of horror cinema some long-overdue action.
Then there’s the director’s annoyingly excessive use of wide-angle lenses in this film, and the constant floating camera movement. This technique is used to create a sense of intimacy and drama while bringing the practical settings and characters into deep focus, but all it brings is total claustrophobia to an ostensibly grandiose stage with the attention span of a TikTok junkie.
Is Guillermo del Toro’s Frankenstein terrible? No. A masterpiece? Absolutely not! It has a few amusing moments of quirkiness along with a few cool scenes of bloody chunks on tables, but the same can be said about Frankenhooker, and that movie is 64 minutes shorter.
Or, there is also Comedy Central’s inebriated rendering of the eternally overspun tale:
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Frankenstein (2025)
PROS
- Beautiful production design
- Amazing montage of body part harvesting
- Top-notch wardrobe
- Atmospheric score by Alexandre Desplat
- Walder Frey as the friendly blind man
CONS
- Abrupt tonal shifts
- Overburdened narrative
- Incoherent human character arcs
- Sporadic pacing
- Bursting at the seams with truncated plot points
- Chronic Overstating
- No scene is left unchewed
- Exhausting runtime
- Mia Goth's accent
- Rushed ending
